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The Shanleys' Story By Logan Schiciano

On a hot and humid day in the summer of 2015, Northwestern University head lacrosse coach Kelly Amonte Hiller first laid eyes on Kiera and Katie Shanley.

The sisters, from Fayetteville, New York, were invited to one of Amonte’s summer lacrosse camps at Milton Academy in Massachusetts after drawing the attention of an assistant coach at a tournament a few weeks prior.

“On the field they just had a tremendous connection with each other,” Amonte Hiller said. “And I was just really impressed by the spirit that they had as people. I knew they could bring a lot to the table.”

After a visit to Evanston that fall, the Shanleys were hooked. high The sisters – only high school freshmen at the time – committed to play for the seven-time national champion Northwestern Wildcats.

Kiera Shanley (left) is an attacker on Northwestern lacrosse and Katie (right) is a midfielder.

The very next summer, they were back in Milton, welcoming the next batch of potential recruits, including Hannah Gillespie. She recalled the first time she met Katie and Kiera.

“It kind of seems ridiculous, but after talking with them I was like ‘I think I wanna go [to Northwestern],’” said Gillespie, now a junior on Northwestern lacrosse team. “These girls had no idea who I was but wanted to get to know me and just made me feel welcome.”

For the Shanleys, also current juniors on the team, lacrosse is more than just a game. Neither leads Northwestern in goals, draws, or ground balls – but they lead the team in heart. From high fives on the field to hugs on the couch, the Shanleys never leave a teammate hanging. And even in the hardest of times, the sisters have never left each other's side.

Family

At Northwestern, some refer to the Shanleys as “the twins.” But they aren’t twins. They’re triplets. Their brother Jack also plays lacrosse at Manhattan College – winners of the 2022 MAAC Championship.

The three siblings have matching tattoos. They’re hard to notice in games, but Katie’s is on her left wrist. Kiera’s, often concealed by her high socks, is on her right ankle. Jack’s is on his bicep.

“We wanted to do something that symbolizes the three of us,” Kiera said. “We figured that would be a good enough reason for our parents to let us get a tattoo.”

Last year, each Shanley had three triangles inked with a different one filled-in, signifying the siblings’ birth order. It serves as a permanent reminder of their bond, which has only grown in recent years.

“We’ve always been close,” Kiera said. “But since we’re at different schools now, the times we do have together we actually cherish more.”

Whether they’re in the locker room, at the airport or at dinner, Katie and Kiera will try to watch every one of their brother’s games. But even though they can still catch him on the screen, being apart was a major adjustment, Katie said.

“It’s kind of interesting to think that Jack could go his four years of college without people even knowing he’s a triplet,” Katie said. “Sometimes I do feel bad because he’s there all by himself, because at home everyone knew us as the triplets.”

The Shanley triplets all play college lacrosse – Katie and Kiera at Northwestern and Jack at Manhattan College. The Shanley's father Brian and uncle also played college lacrosse at Boston College.

The Shanleys come from a lacrosse family. Their parents, Brian and Michelle, both played all seasons of sports in high school. Brian went on to play lacrosse at Boston College. All three siblings started lacrosse in kindergarten. Katie and Kiera have always played on the same teams.

But lacrosse wasn’t the first sport the Shanley children took up. The triplets got their start in soccer. For one, the stint didn’t last long.

“All three tried it – Kiera and Jack loved it. The next week we went Katie just propped up a chair, dug into some donuts and said she wasn’t really into sweating, That was pretty much the end of her soccer career,” Michelle said. “

But sweating didn’t keep Katie away from lacrosse, which Michelle said her daughters fell in love with because of the relationships they’ve made rather than playing the sport itself.

“Not everyone likes practicing, but they couldn’t wait to go every day,” Michelle said. “Lacrosse was the one thing they never complained about.”

On the field, the Shanleys have a unique connection, Kiera said.

“I just trust her. I mean, why wouldn’t I trust her? She’s my best friend,” Kiera said. “We spend every second together, so we just know how the other thinks. On the field, we have really good communication and just play freely together.”

Kiera was born at 6:30 p.m. on March 22, 2001. Katie was born at 6:31 p.m. Despite what the sisters claim, they’re identical.

Kiera and Katie are identical, but Kiera (5'6") is slightly taller than Katie (5'5"). Katie has a cartilage piercing, while Kiera has more freckles.

“We don’t get it,” Kiera said. “We just think we look so different.”

Off the field, the two do have their similarities. They’ve always had the same friends. They shared the same room through freshman year of high school and live in the same house now with many of their teammates.

Michelle said it was difficult at first when friends and family would package Katie and Kiera as “the twins.” But those who know the sisters best appreciate their unique qualities.

“Katie’s always been a go-getter. She never settles for anything,” Gillespie said. “Kiera’s really outgoing and just brings that sense of fun. She always wants to make sure everyone is okay and really brings a sense of family to the team.”

The Shanley triplets' tattoos signify the order in which they were born and serve as a permanent reminder of their friendship, Kiera and Katie said.

Improving throughout their grade school years, the Shanleys quickly showed they were fit to play lacrosse at the collegiate level. When it became time to start visiting schools in seventh grade, Michelle and Brian sat down with their daughters and asked if the two wanted to play together at the next level.

They both said 'yes', without hesitation, Michelle said.

“Regardless of where I went, I was going with Katie,” Kiera said. “I am big on staying in my comfort zone, and Katie is my comfort zone. For me, it was a no-brainer.”

Team

Gillespie had just made a horrible mistake.

In the team’s final regular season contest of the 2022 season, Northwestern trailed its rival Maryland 9-5 coming out of a timeout. With just over a minute remaining in the first half, the Wildcats’ goalie Madison Doucette threw a routine pass towards Gillespie, who missed the ball. The Terrapins pounced on the ‘Cats mistake and took the ball down the field for an easy score.

“I was so mad at myself,” Gillespie said. “Anything anyone said to me, I was kind of just shutting it out.”

But then Katie came up to Gillespie, grabbed the junior defender by the shoulders and talked to her.

“She looked me in the eyes and said, ‘I believe in you. You got this,’ and gave me this whole speech,” Gillespie said. “Her really taking the time – not just a pat on the back – to give me this motivational speech was something that really flipped a switch.”

Whether they’re on the field or the sidelines, the Shanleys affect the game, Amonte Hiller said.

“They’re willing to do whatever it takes. People watching the games at home on TV don’t necessarily know how crucial they are, but our team knows. I think they’ve been a huge X factor for this team,” Amonte Hiller said.

Kiera and Katie dominated high school lacrosse at Fayetteville-Manlius High School. The Hornets made it to the NYSPHSAA Class B state semifinals three of the Shanleys' four seasons, losing in the finals twice.

Both sisters were 2017 and 2018 First-Team All-League and 2018 U.S. Lacrosse High School All-Americans. Kiera led their high school team in goals as a senior while Katie paced the squad in assists.

Kiera and Katie led their high school team to the state finals twice and were both 2018 U.S. Lacrosse High School All-Americans.

But the Shanleys said coming to Northwestern, one of the top collegiate programs year in and year out, was challenging. The sisters went from being the stars of their team to wondering if they would ever see the field in games.

This has not stopped them from finding ways to stay involved. After every Northwestern goal, Kiera will run down the sideline high-fiving every teammate and coach. She said this assignment, which was passed down to her as a freshman, suits her personality.

“College has kind of taught me that every role is important and every person on the team is important,” Kiera said. “You can play zero minutes, you can play every minute of the game, but that doesn’t change our relationship with our teammates or how hard we work.”

“I’m not a quitter,” Katie said. “It’s super easy to not be playing and just stand on the sideline and be quiet and not enjoy it. But that’s not the experience I want. I love my teammates so much and it brings me so much joy to cheer for them and make them smile.”

Attacker Erin Coykendall said the Shanleys’ voices are always the loudest from the sidelines and that the sisters push her every day to be better.

“They’re so energetic and supportive,” Coykendall said. “They’re great when we’re doing well, but even when we lose, they’re the first people to come and check on me. They just bring good vibes.”

Tragedy

After a crushing loss to Syracuse in the 2021 Final Four, the Shanleys and the rest of the lacrosse team arrived on campus in the fall hungry for revenge. The Lakeshow was re-energized with four returning fifth years, a full slate of “fall ball” ahead, and with Covid cases subsiding, a return to normalcy on campus.

With time to spare before official practices, the Shanleys and some teammates went to Home Depot to purchase supplies for a backyard strobe light project. They were unsure exactly what they needed. But they knew someone would.

Will Gottheld was a longtime friend of the Shanleys – they all went to high school together. At University of Buffalo, where Gottheld attended college, he was considered the “campus construction man,” often going door to door offering to fix things for fraternities and sororities, Katie said.

“I Facetimed Will and he literally took me step by step through how to build it,” Katie said. “When we got back home he wouldn’t stop texting me being like ‘How's it going? Did you finish? Can I help?’”

Katie dated Gottheld for over three years. They broke up early last year but remained close, talking every day.

“Even when we weren’t dating, he never stopped supporting me and loving me. He knew me better than I knew myself," Katie said

On Thursday, September 9 – a few days after the Home Depot FaceTime – Katie and Kiera were at Walter Athletic Center for an early morning lift. After working out, Katie texted Gottheld. No answer.

“I kind of just assumed he had an exam or an early class and wasn’t really on his phone, so I didn’t really think anything of it,” Katie said.

Around 4 p.m., Katie still hadn’t heard from Gottheld. She called some of his friends at Buffalo. They told her Gottheld died by suicide earlier that day. He was 21 years old.

“It was the lowest I’ve ever been in my life,” Katie said. “I was very confused and felt guilty not knowing that he was in a bad state. You’re always kind of questioning what more you could have done.”

Lacrosse went on hold. Everything went on hold. The sisters went home to Fayetteville to attend Gottheld’s services and be with family.

“As a parent you often get advice on how to potty train – how to raise your children in certain ways – but no one really tells you how to deal with something like that,” Michelle said. “You’re only as happy as your saddest child, and at that time, they were broken.”

Coykendall was Katie’s freshman roommate. She was with Katie when she learned of Gottheld's death and made the trip back home to New York to remember Gottheld with the Shanleys.

“I just wanted them to know that I had their back,” Coykendall said. “Being there for them was a reminder that they have 40 girls in Evanston who are going to support them through it all.”

Katie and Kiera were hurting. But they had teammates. They had their coaches. They had a family. And they had each other.

“When I was having a bad day – even if I wasn’t crying – Kiera could tell,” Katie said. “Having a sibling with you going through something this tough – it was a game changer.”

Resilience

Just one week after Gottheld’s funeral services, the Shanleys were back on the field with a new perspective – for lacrosse and life. Kiera and Katie said they gained a greater appreciation for those around them and were motivated to raise awareness for mental health.

“I don’t think I realized how much of a problem this was until it happened to me,” Katie said.

Suicide has hit women’s collegiate athletics hard in recent months. In April, Lauren Bennett, who played softball at James Madison University, died by an apparent suicide. She was only 21. Just a few weeks prior, Sarah Shulze, a track star at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, took her own life. And in March, Stanford women’s soccer captain Katie Meyer ended her life by suicide.

Within the women’s lacrosse community, Vanderbilt attacker Cailin Bracken stepped away from the sport to focus on mental health and addressed the lofty expectations athletes bear to perform in an essay titled "A Letter to College Sports" last month.

“We feel like we’re a perfectly curated glass ball, and if we come near a hard surface at the wrong angle, we’ll shatter,” Bracken said.

At Northwestern, the Shanleys are working to cultivate a culture where teammates feel valued and comfortable being themselves.

“We get texts from Katie and Kiera in our team GroupMe checking in, telling everyone they love them,” Gillespie said. “We just need to focus on having fun, and Katie and Kiera are great at doing that.”

Katie said that college athletes are not given enough individualized attention when it comes to mental health.

“A lot of people have the misconception that like we’re here, and we get all this gear and all these things given to us, but we’re still human beings. We put a lot of pressure on ourselves competing at this level, and people need to realize that.”

Last month, Amonte Hiller approached the Shanleys with the idea to make mental health the focus of the team’s final regular season home game against Johns Hopkins.

The “Causes Game” became an opportunity for Northwestern lacrosse players to promote any causes in which they are passionate – from cancer research to suicide prevention to gender equity. The players did the planning, which included designing a T-shirt centered on courage, creating a video and making social media graphics.

“We thought that making it something that people could pick individual causes would make it more powerful to each person,” Kiera said. “It was a really great way to connect with each other and connect with the community as well.”

As they’ve done all season, the Shanleys remembered Gottheld at the game by writing “LLWG” on their wrist tape, which stands for “Long Live Will Gottheld.” Katie also wrote Gottheld’s initials on her cleats.

Katie and Kiera's wrist tape labeled with "LLWG," in memory of Will Gottheld. The Shanleys promoted suicide prevention and mental health during the Causes Game in April.

Though Gillespie said the issues the players chose to promote “aren’t going to go away with just one Causes Game,” she said the day was a big success among the team and hopes it becomes a tradition moving forward.

Heading the planning for the game was just one example of how the Shanleys have stepped up this year. Amonte Hiller said Katie and Kiera have distinguished themselves as leaders through the way they’ve dealt with adversity and spread positivity on the team this season.

“I love sports because they teach you how to have resilience in those hard moments, to support yourself and the people around you," Amonte Hiller said. "That’s what Katie and Kiera are so passionate about. They’re truly great teammates, and they understand that playing this game is not just about scoring goals or making passes, it’s about something bigger.”

The Shanleys’ resilience, particularly Katie's, has not only gripped the hearts of her teammates and coaches but the entire Big Ten conference.

On May 3, she was named Northwestern’s 2022 All-Big Ten Sportsmanship Honoree. This award is given to “individuals who have distinguished themselves through sportsmanship and ethical behavior, and have demonstrated good citizenship outside of the sports-competition setting,” according to the Big Ten.

Though lacrosse has always been a focus for the Shanleys, Michelle said she admires how her daughters have used the past year's hardship for good.

“We are most proud of how they embrace life and the relationships they have in their lives, and we are proud of the people that they have become. They are hard working and dedicated, but most of all, they are kind," Michelle said.

Northwestern lacrosse photos courtesy of Jack Sullivan and Northwestern Athletics. All other photos courtesy of the Shanley family.