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Professor Spends Entire Tax Refund on Kuratas Fighting Robot

Professor Dzmitry Yuran of the College of Arts and Communication has used the entirety of his tax refund to purchase a Kuratas fighting robot according to familiar sources.

The four meter (13 ft) tall and nearly five-ton robot is operated by a single pilot and powered by a diesel-electric engine. Unveiled by Suidobashi Heavy Industries in 2012, the robot quickly earned a dedicated following around the world.

Professor Dzmitry Yuran of the School of Arts and Communication

Yuran, best known among Florida Tech staff and students for his gentle demeanor and rolled-up sleeves, believes it was inevitable that he would eventually purchase his own giant murder-bot. “When I first saw [Kuratas] I knew I would one day own it; own its raw power,” said Yuran as a chill gripped everyone in the room. “I may do great and terrible things with this machine, but I will enjoy every moment. I will finally have that raise I have been denied for so long.”

The Kuratas robot can be purchased with both shoulder and arm mounted accessories including a 6,000-rpm twin rotary cannon, a LOHAS launcher, a humanoid claw crusher called the “Iron Crow”, and a pneumatically powered pile driver. Citing his fondness for melee combat, Yuran elected to purchase his Kuratas mech with both the “Iron Crow” eviscerator claw and pile driver.

Kuratas robot by Suidobashi Heavy Industries

Delivery of Yuran’s personal dreadnaught is scheduled for late January. For more information on the Kuratas fighting robot, or to purchase one yourself, please visit http://suidobashijuko.jp/