My friend said, “you just draw little pictures all the time. And I still do.”
- Bob Watel, accomplished architectural illustrator, interviewed in St. Louis, 2003
When I was in the 6th grade, my sister brought home a sample of italic script she had learned at a summer program. I said to myself that I could do it better, and I did. Then I realized how useful calligraphy was, so I kept it up.
My studies in calligraphy were all self-driven, and over time they included not only copying scripts that I saw, but also looking through the archives at the Harvard University Libraries, getting instruction from medieval calligraphy masters, and some commissioned work for weddings or other events. Also, lots and lots of practice through making things for my friends and myself.
I had been working on my personal brand since even earlier in elementary school. Ever since I was praised for my cursive in the 4th grade, I started working on the aesthetics of my signature. Over the years, I added studio art and some basic graphic design; so I developed a logo with which to sign my works.
I was an artist in hiding behind a scientist front operation, but I was always an artist first. In college, I formatted my final lab write up to look like it was published in one of the top three scientific journals. Aside from the typography, I printed out the blocks of text, hand drew my molecular structures to look like they had been drawn in one of the chemistry programs, taped them in the proper layout just so, and photocopied them to look like the images were inset in the running text.
So I knew that no matter how I accommodated the expectations of the people around me, I was still my own self.
In fact, flexibility, adaptability, and, in short, the capability to change was a defining characteristic of my intrinsic self. I was encouraged to conform, but I found ways to blend in and achieve mainstream successes by using my unconventional blend of skills and propensities. I did fear being accused of having a changeable nature, flighty thinking, or unfixed opinions. Yet when grounded in my center, displaying morphable skin helps others and myself feel more connected and at ease.
I did not learn to value that as much until all the self work I have done more recently, but back then it certainly helped me with all the many molds and boxes of expectations I found myself morphing through and around. My center of kindness, understanding, peace and growth is where I find strength and where I return when I have sometimes gotten lost. It holds my DNA together, and protects it from too much harmful mutation.
Very early on, I noticed that my name shortened to "llchen" was similar to the word "lichen." I had loved to examine lichen and moss as a child (we had a small wood in the back of our yard), and I enjoyed the idea that the lichen was two organisms living as one creature.
I empathized.
The ideas embodied by the lichen helped me understand before I could have articulated it that I could have disparate interests that could work together, rather than having to compromise one for any of the others. Even while others asked me to "stop wasting time" on this or that other artistic or creative pursuit, I always considered these pursuits as parallel to my science training, and I knew that pursuing them helped me be a better scientist as much as understanding science made me a better artist.
Recent research into lichen has revealed that they are more than just a symbiosis of two cross-kingdom species. While the collaboration of the two species allow lichen to exist across many different habitats, scientists now think there is a multi-species symbiosis going on, in which the well-described lichen structure attracts and supports other microbes.
The discovery of Lcillus spp.
lcillus designatrix - gram positive beneficial organism capable of individual motility and biofilm formation. Somewhat related to bacillus subtilis in many traits, though not taxonomically.
Within the last three years, as I have been doing more graphic design work for other people, I refined my logo and started thinking about a website. I had the words "design" and "illustration" in my logo, and as I was playing around with combinations of these words and my initials, I hit upon the sound of lcillus as something that sounded like a bacterium, like a lactobacillus, or just a bacillus.
Bacteria are fascinating one-celled creatures, and for someone of small stature as myself, they are an inspiring testament to the impact such a tiny organism can have on the world. Further research into bacilli that might have something to do with lichens or mosses led me to bacillus subtilis. This very useful organism can form biofilms (hey, it's also into architecture!) in the rhizosphere, where the roots of mosses live. As biofilms, the bacteria protect the roots and form a commensal relationship with the plant.
Also, the biofilms are being studied for many uses, and the patterns that have been revealed in biofilm formation under varying circumstances are quite intriguing. Even when organized or organizing into their biofilm structure, some bacilli retain the ability to move, and can take off to lead a less domestic life. This was it. I had found an organism that works together, creates structure and beauty with very little in the way of materials, and then has a rebellious streak that gives it just enough edge, but not enough to destroy the harmony it has created.
So I am an lcillus. I chose designatrix on the advice of my friend who speaks (yes, speaks) Latin (thank you John B. Kuhner). I draw characteristics from bacillus subtilis, and my understanding of myself and my abilities is informed by the humble lichen. My explorations have resulted from uncontrollable events, but I go with it and see what benefit I can derive and bring forth through my creativity and design.
It's nice to meet you.